It was said by St. Francis – “Preach the Gospel at all times and when necessary use words”. It is true that often times the greatest message is one that is lived out. For that reason I believe John Piper is preparing to give his greatest message to date.

Maybe I’m a little out of line to lay that on you, after all I’ve never listened to one of Piper’s messages. Although I have heard “little Pipers” playing out his words quite often in my years of ministry. Before anyone stones me, at least consider that I own two of Piper’s books. *

So what message is Piper preparing? According to his church’s website, John Piper is stepping down for eight months as the lead pastor of Bethlehem Baptist Church in MN. He cited that his marriage needed time. Ultimately that his wife has been in many ways second to his public ministry life for their 41 years of marriage. He explains in the announcement that he will not have any public speaking – including blog posting, Twitter, or book writing. What a message! Considered to be at the pinnacle of 21^st century Christian voices and he acknowledges the sin in his life and the necessary process he needs to undergo to be freed from that sin.

If you have some extra time, read John’s Statement to his church. After doing so, let me ask you – how would you feel if this was your Senior Pastor? I just wonder, what if my Pastor were to take a lengthy leave of absence to reconcile some area of his personal life? Let me bring this in a little. What if I were to have to step aside to get healthy spiritually and relationally? Would those who consider me their pastor have grace on me? Would the church I love and serve grant me a time of renewal? I pray that I’d learn from individuals as Piper so that I can keep sin from having its way in me. And also that my priorities would be right – particularly in putting my family first – as it is perhaps the greatest challenge of ministry. The character of a church is evident in times like these. Let it serve as a reminder that the prayers of the righteous are powerful and effective – and your pastors need them!

I’m going to get real with you here. By real I mean vulnerable. And by vulnerable I mean share something very personal – a heavy dose of my weakness as a leader and as a person. Not sure if it helps set the tone for you, or just helps me to take a huge gulp before going any further.

After reading through the first half of DNA of Relationships, I came to a helpful self-realization. Let me pause to say this book is the absolute best read if you are looking for one of the following: (1) to understand yourself better, including your fears, wants, needs, issues, etc.  (2) you want to heal a relationship – particularly within a marriage, with your kids, or whomever you live with. There, that’s my plug. At least read the first two chapters.

Back to my self-realization – my greatest fear is failure.

That felt like a ton of bricks being dropped on a Ford pick-up truck. I just hope I’m built Ford tough to deal with people’s perceptions of me now. **  My fear of failure is the root of all evil. Ok, not really, but it certainly has led me to accomplish much this far in my life. However, it has also about destroyed me. She’s one beast I can’t let get the best of me.

It was brought to my attention by another blog writer who I don’t know, that my fear of failure has led me down another ill-gotten path. Being controlling. After reading THIS article about terrible leadership, and then talking it over with my wife, it dawned on me that again the problem rests with my fear of failure. In case you decided not to click on “THIS” then let me share my issue. In a nutshell I’m not naturally an empowering leader. That’s true in my home and with my friends, and certainly in the workplace.

I have this love/difficulty relationship with the Holy Spirit, particularly in times like this. Like when I read a top ten list, hoping that it doesn’t describe me, and then the Holy Spirit goes Chuck Norris on me. The beauty of my relationship with God is that I can be honest with the Holy Spirit and accept conviction. It’s writing about my wrongs that is rough. So why write (aren’t we all thinking it)? Essentially because it validates God’s grace; my acknowledging poor leadership within myself; and to invite you to roundhouse kick me as well – in love of course.

If you would be so inclined, please share with me how you see my controlling nature at work. Hold those comments for email [jonk@valley-church.com]. However, consider giving feedback in the comment section below as well. Do you struggle with fear of failure? Or would you say you’re controlling? If either, what remedies have you put into practice which help overcome one struggle or the other?

Last weekend I attended a wedding, that Kelly was a bridesmaid in. It was an outdoor wedding. I haven’t been much of a fan of outdoor weddings. Particularly when it pours all day until thirty minutes before the ceremony. Imagine the temperature going from 69 to 80 in less than two hours. It was an experience – one to write about. * On the way up to Minnesota, I was telling Kelly that I don’t get outdoor weddings. Why not do it inside – even if just for being more functional. Weather issues, umbrellas, sweating, non-existent bathrooms, dirty – and particularly risky. I’m a little partial to the church facility too. But this experience triggered an unusual thought – this was the most Judeo-Christian wedding I’ve ever attended. Is it perhaps more “biblical” to attend a wedding similar to the one I recently took part in? Let’s look at a first century wedding that is recorded in Scripture. John 2 says that Jesus attended a wedding with his family members and a few of his friends. It is very possible this was an outdoor wedding. And obviously, by the text, involved an abundance of wine. Not much different than what I recently experienced. Now don’t go assuming how much wine yours truly consumed. Stay on subject here.   I was quite enamored by the whole set-up. Wedding ceremony between two Jesus-loving Christians. Followed by a wine-tasting social gathering, which flowed into a feast. I almost forgot to mention the yard games during “social hour” (they cleverly termed it as such) – it was a fantastic scene. My attention to the weather waned as I was consumed with the parallels between John 2 and this wedding. Of course there were aspects that differed from a traditional Jewish wedding – that which recognized Jesus as both Lord and Bridegroom for all who gathered in this grassy field. And no miracle took place during this wedding – well no changing water into wine anyways. Judah being quiet during the ceremony may have been a miracle.

I’m very intrigued by this concept. A Judeo-Christian wedding. How sweet. Nothing like shooting a hole in my previously held disliking for outdoor weddings. For me, this was a worshipful experience. Plus, I’m so obsessed with Jesus that I love when circumstances allow me to imagine being in Scripture with my Savior.

I have to comment on the newest trend in the church – that being the latest translation of the Bible – the ESV. The English Standard Version was put out in 2001, but in the last year has really made a name for itself. The “name” that it claims, is being the most literal translation of the Greek and Hebrew biblical text. Maybe they have pulled it off, if so well done. But in the midst of doing so, they’ve inserted a lot of interesting word choices. Almost to the point where it doesn’t come off as smooth English – interesting given it’s name, ESV. In some odd way, it reminds me of the Dos Equis commercial – Most Interesting Man in the World. One of his lines is “He can speak French…in Russian.” I may consider adding the ESV slogan, “You can read Greek…in English.”

ESV is really taking off in one area of Christianity – 5 point Calvinists. John Piper being the poster-child. Just saying that probably sent some of you to Family Christian Bookstore to buy this new translation. And speaking of purchases – one well known online Christian retailer said it’s the fastest selling new product in it’ history. We, Christians, are so trendy.
I have to admit though, once I saw Wayne Grudem and J.I. Packer’s name on the list of editors – I softened my stance. Two of the greatest theologians of our time.

And a bonus, you can get the Apocrypha translated and included in your ESV Bible. Of course my skeptic side says that if you want to translate the Scriptures  ‘word for word’, then why are you ever putting in the Apocrypha? But I won’t comment further on that.

Will this trend take over the NIV one day? Will the ESV be the main version preached in my church? Will I one day be laughed at by the postmodern generation for not giving in to the ESV? And most importantly how will this be translated in other languages if it’s the English Standard Version? My head is full of questions. Time to check out and go listen to the new Hillsong Live CD, while researching the up and coming church model. Apparently, I’m a trendy Christian too.

I’m enamored by the life of Jesus Christ. Having spent four days in Chicago studying His life with a group of pastors, I was hit with many new insights in the life of Christ. Some have deep implications for ministry – these are the things that get me excited. Yet there was one particular details of Jesus’ life which got personal. I’d like to take you there – to Matthew 3:13-17 – the baptism of Jesus. For thirty years Jesus had grew in wisdom and stature, and in preparation for this time. What I hadn’t realized before was how Jesus’ baptism was the catalyst of his ministry. Understanding why Jesus was baptized is quite perplexing, and many theories have been presented over time. I believe it was for him to receive his Father’s blessing to enter a ministry that would last around 3.5 years – ending with his death and resurrection.

Following my conversion in January 2001, I spent a few months devouring God’s Word, and started growing in wisdom and understanding. Then, I was presented with a biblical concept of baptism. A baptism that became an outward expression of my inward faith. That took place in May 2001. While I didn’t understand this in full until this past week – my baptism was the birthing place of my ministry. Within a few weeks I was in China – still very much unschooled but having a zeal for the Lord. The ministry God did through my team and I was almost hard to believe. Within two weeks I was meeting daily with my Chinese roommate to discuss the Scriptures. In no time our group grew to 8-10 Chinese students seeking God through the pages of our “butterfly” Bible.

Upon my return to Iowa, I was thrust into Bible study leadership, evangelism projects, and prayer meetings. It felt surreal, as I considered myself (and still do) an ordinary unschooled man [Acts 4:13].

Don’t miss the point. I believe it was my believer baptism that initiated my ministry – in China and at Central College. Maybe this isn’t part of your dogma, but take note of this. Have you been baptized as a believer? Do you wonder if your ministry in your community and your church could escalate? I challenge you to examine Christ’s example. He didn’t need to be baptized – after all he was without sin. Yet he chose to identify with man. And, as the triune God meets at the Jordan River – Jesus takes the plunge. Will you follow?

If you go to Valley Church, you have a unique opportunity. Leadership has given permission to baptize in the Raccoon River, August 1^st. I have nothing against indoor baptisms; however, I desire for youth and adults alike to experience the power of following in Jesus’ footsteps. To walk as Jesus did [1 John 2:6].

I received a phone call this past week from a co-worker of mine. He had some news to share with me that he thought would get me really excited. Knowing my love for running, and particularly marathons, he began to pitch this idea: let’s go run the Great Wall Marathon in China.
Let me insert an important note here; I love China. Having been there twice, I am constantly longing to return. One would think that being that I have a heart for marathons and for China, I’d know about the Great Wall Marathon. False. This was new news to me. I almost bought a plane ticket I was that excited. Can you imagine – running 26.2 miles up and down a stretch of the Great Wall? It’ll be brutal. There are 5164 steps to run up and down. But it will be so worth it. The view from the Great Wall is incredible. And, in my opinion, it’s likely the greatest manmade structure ever built.

If I had a bucket list, this would have a solid shot at the top. The idea of a bucket list sounds cool but have no idea where to start with the brainstorming. But this struck a new thought – what if I had a marathon bucket list. I started imagining – if I could run a marathon anywhere, where would I want to complete the 26.2 stretch?

This is the list I came up with:

Weihe Grand Bridge – the longest bridge in the world, and just so happens to be in my home away from home country, China.

Moon – surely this does not seem feasible, but then again how many of my favorites seem to be feasible. Just roll with it. Imagine the view of earth, while running 26.2 miles on rocks. Would really demolish the Boston qualifying time – assuming Neil Armstrong is right and that mankind can leap. **

Mammoth Cave – the longest stretch of cave in the entire world at 367 miles long. That’s more than twice as long as the second lengthiest cave. It can be found in Kentucky; or online.

Jerusalem – this would honestly be incredible. Marathon running is 90% mental. I wonder if I’d be so amazed with the structures and significance of Jerusalem to ever notice that I’m running 138,336 feet.

Jurassic Park – seriously how sweet would this be. Running by a bunch of dinosaurs. According to the picture, I think maybe this marathon has been done before. A little dangerous. But a great cheering section.

Noah’s Ark – I’d have forty days to complete it. And I’d probably win, since my competition would include just 8 others.

I don’t know if it can get any grandeur than the Great Wall Marathon. I’d almost have to quit running marathons afterwards – for how could it get any better.

Monday was one of those days where I wish I could have fired myself and then been re-hired two weeks later. That’s a more harsh way of doing what some call a sabbatical, which for those who are unfamiliar is a period of paid leave given to some pastors at some churches. The idea is for the pastor to leave for a few weeks or a few months and get away from the day to day duties of his or her ministry. It’s often a time of being refreshed, re-energized in order to re-engage in the ever important role they play in the Church. I don’t receive a sabbatical, so I’ve concluded that firing and re-hiring myself would maybe work instead. Although neither of these options really would suffice for what my heart is in limbo over.

I’m wrestling over some big questions in my ministry. Questions that deal with discontent, spiritual discouragement (very different then self-discouragement), and a longing for a more healthy, holistic high school ministry.

After retreating in Chicago with ministry guru Dann Spader, my longing hit even deeper. Studying the life and ministry of Jesus Christ these past few days has been as exhilarating an adventure as I’ve had in some time. On a personal note, I feel like I’ve been introduced to a brand new Jesus. I have gained much insight on the life of my Christ. Then, to compare the way that I have led our high school ministry compared to how Jesus led his – I’m struggling with this. God is refining my paradigm of ministry, that I am realizing. With time, ideas will become more concrete. Now the challenge will be how to implement this Christology into VCSM. Something I’d prefer to do without having to be fired and re-hired!

The difficulty in admitting my discontent, is that I hate to fail. I’m driven by excellence and have no problem admitting I want to be the best. Not necessarily better than you (whoever ‘you’ are) but the best that I can be in the strength and power of God. I’m certain God desires to do more with me, and more with our high school ministry than what is now taking place. Neither is unhealthy. However, there remains too much potential in both to accept them as they are now. There’s going to be some slicing and dicing in the months to come. After I pull a Jesus – and enter the wilderness for a period. Thankfully, the Spirit is the one leading me there.

Fatherhood is a daily adventure. One of my favorite moments of every day is coming home and seeing my son. I’ve noticed that I don’t think it’s one of Judah’s favorite moments, but I’m learning to get over it. Of course when Kelly comes home he shows off his speed by galloping to the door. Nothing personal right Judah?!
Being a first time father is like riding a rollercoaster blindfolded. I’m  never sure what’s coming next but I’m constantly feeling and thinking something. There are times when my stomach is in knots and other times when I wonder if this joy ride ever has to end. For the most part every day is a highlight reel in daddy-land.

I’ve been coming to some realizations lately regarding my little one.

• He might become a first-generation stay-at-home dad. The kid knows how to handle a small vacuum, ‘re-organize’ my dresser, and just this morning attempted to scrub the floor with a napkin.
• He may never grow hair in his Kalvig receding hairlines. All the more reason for Kelly and I to have an arranged marriage.
• He is going to test his teachers. I’m actually slightly concerned for his preschool teacher in a couple years. Judah is quite the charmer, and he’s already figuring out how to use it to try and get his way. He’s already fooled me a few times. Pretty sure my 15 month old has outwitted me as much as many of my 15 year old ministry students have.
• Even the youngest of kids are always listening. Judah still has a small vocabulary – about six or seven one syllable words. So when one day we heard him say “Ohh Yeah”, Kelly and I stopped dead in our tracks. Excuse me, just how did he discover this combo words? Didn’t have to look far. Apparently Kelly says it all the time. Go figure that neither of us realized she said this so often – until our son more or less pointed it out. As you can imagine I’m being much more careful on what I allow Judah to hear. Completely ruled out all country music.
• Lastly, I’m starting to realize that Judah is not my own. He is the Lord’s. I’m most delighted in being his father – there is much joy that comes with the responsibility. I’m almost like his John the Baptist, preparing the way. Becoming more aware of my role in Judah’s life helps me to raise him in the way of salvation. Not that he is guaranteed salvation; rather in growing him in the knowledge of God that he will hopefully choose for himself to follow Christ. To put a picture to this final thought – recall the image from the Lion King of Mufasa raising young Simba towards heaven. “He’s yours God”.

A year after graduating another stellar class of high school seniors, it was time to get the group back together. With one year of college behind them, I was excited to catch up and hear all sorts of stories. They didn’t disappoint. I admit there was a sense of nostalgia, however, I was more so reminded that those days seem far removed from this old man’s life. Nevertheless, I enjoyed dialoguing with these students. After going through what I believe to be the most shaping year of life, there happened to flow some interesting answers to the questions I was posing. That first year of college is filled with new opportunities as well as a new set of disasters. I believe a greater number of students have been crushed coming out of that first year than have been victorious. My scale of determining this is based not only on the spiritual realm (which is central to life, so arguably most important) but also in terms of maturing, physically taking care of their body and the mind, and being good stewards with their money (the greatest degree is dropping out and losing thousands). The 13^th grade is concerning. Search hundreds of statistics and they will virtually all tell you the destruction that high school graduates face the following year. As a high school pastor, I’m deeply bothered by this. There has to be a different way.

One student alluded to the importance of going through rough times your freshman year of college. His point was essentially that choosing to engage in sin and recklessness is part of growing up. As if one needs to experience the world in order to become a better person. As appalling as this was, I believe this is the mindset of many college freshmen. Our young people have been patterned by this world. I decided to put my brain to work to see if there would be some way to undo this pit of mass destruction. I have an answer – hypothetical anyways.

That first year out of high school, students would engage in a one year project. And there would be numerous options from which to choose. With the help of the parents, school counselor, and youth pastor (for those who applies to) – students would spend their senior year finding and applying for their one year project. Though not limited to just this list, this gives you an idea of what I’m referring to. Graduates could do a year-long mission trip, serve in the military, join the Peace Corps, volunteer at a local homeless shelter, participate in a Jesus-like field trip (learn God’s Word, do ministry, serve…), etc. Students would not pay to participate in these experiences, although it would not be seen as a way to make and save money either. The purpose would be to give graduates a place to mature, discover themselves, and focus on others. Quite an achievement given that this is the most “me” focused period in life. It would remove the majority of roadblocks which students are currently abusing their freshman year of college.

Unlike working right out of college, this year-long project has a definite stopping point. It also doesn’t bring in lots of money – which typically attracts students to never going into college once they have a steady income. This would get students away from home, in a constructive environment, for one year. Afterwards they can pursue whatever their heart desires – hopefully school. At this point they would be much more likely to succeed without falling into the pit.

It isn’t perfect, but the more I dwell on this option, the more I may leverage my influence with future graduates to change the course of their future with a simple twelve month commitment.

Recently I have been convinced that this blog is not my own. Let’s be honest, who wants to listen to just me. That’s rhetorical, so you don’t need to remind me ** So I decided that it would be wonderful to have other people’s perspectives as well. I plan to do some blog interviews from time to time. The first is an interview with my brother Dan. He’s three years younger but ten times smarter. My brother has a different worldview. In some ways I believe he represents a large sector of American twenty-somethings. He offered to answer five deep and personal questions. Knowing Dan, he would welcome (as would I) feedback. However keep in mind that he is my brother – whom I love – so any comments that appear to attack him will be immediately deleted. However, don’t let that scare you away from responding – that is the purpose of this blog after all!

1. Would you identify yourself as a Christian? How would you describe Jesus Christ?

I would not identify myself as a Christian according to the general conception that belief in Jesus as Savior removes all sin and grants everlasting life.  The belief itself does more for the soul/psyche than does the actual self-sacrifice made by a historical individual.  I do not believe Jesus was God, or a direct descendent any more than all other persons.  I do believe Jesus of Nazareth was an extremely holy man, as pure of heart and intention as one is likely to find.  His efforts during life and his self-sacrifice are rare, but certainly not unique in all of history.  Great man, wonderful conceptions of how people ought to treat each other, but not a god. Freedom fighters like Jesus have abounded throughout history.

2. What is your view of Christians? If you could address all Christians what would you say to them?

Each person has differing views, knowledge, and beliefs, so I prefer not to generalize.  However, the core beliefs of Christians I perceive as misguided or ill-informed.  I find it extremely difficult to believe that a loving, caring God of the kind espoused by Christians would reject a good soul from Heaven just because they did not proclaim Jesus as the source of salvation.  There is but One God, and all praise to another deity is idolatry.  Jesus himself proclaimed all praise to God, and again Jesus is godly, not God itself.

3. If you could ask God one question, what would you ask?

What was your intention/desire (if any) for creation?

4. What holds you back from giving your life to Christ?

The illogic of belief that one man’s mortal sacrifice in antiquity grants all future persons everlasting life and removal of all sins and transgressions.  I still accept and follow a great many of the teachings of Jesus, but my life is mine, my actions my own.  Jesus is but one of many sources of learning, guidance, and belief.

5. How did growing up in the church/denomination that you did impact (for better or worse) your current stance on Christianity?

Growing up in the Lutheran church allowed me to be immersed in a more traditional learning environment, without going to extremes.  St Stephens Lutheran Church also provided a great many opportunities to engage my faith and beliefs in the community and interact with other denominations.  This enriched my learning experience, and definitely benefitted my spiritual growth.  I was surrounded by well-intentioned and open people, for which I am grateful.